Hi all. Its been a while since i last blogged. Exams are coming soon. Life pretty much is gonna suck for the next 3 weeks. Anyways, things have been okay, although I'm a bit pissed off at a certain someone, i feel like crying, i think (i know) its pms.

dingding has been a monster. but the malay girl downstairs has contacted the cat society thing so that the cats will be fed during the construction.

my birthday was great thanks all ahahha about 3 weeks too late for the thanks.

i think after that day, i kinda became another person, as cliche as it sounds. a wall was instantly built up around me, and it got higher even during the next week. sometimes things like this make you think about what people's real intentions are. I guess at the end of the day, I am not as understanding or as whatever lah as i appear to be. everyday i ask myself, is this worth, and each time my answer is totally, 100%, cause at the end of the day, the only people you can trust is your family and those whom you regard as part of your family. keeping the circle small, is the only way to protect yourself, and the people you love the most.

okay, back to studying. good luck to all of you for exams!

love,

me

Grey's Anatomy never fails to make me tear/cry. It talks about life, friends, family, love and all the stuff that you can relate to. when the sad part comes, your heart literally sinks and the music is amazing. and not forgetting all the telly-candy mcdreamy and mcsteamy. i like grey's but the thing with shows is that they lead you to hope, that one day your life will be as nice as something. which will never really happen, unless you're really lucky. back to reality i guess.

love,

me

HI ALL! It has really been a while since I last blogged eh. Time for me to update, simply cause now I'm just bored, have been wasting my time the whole day. I am feeling a bit bad, don't really feel like sleeping today cause i slept for 4 hours again (took a 4 hour nap yest also) but as soon as lights are out, my eyes will confirm close.

So anyways, nothing much has been happening in my life. I finally got me braces and i think i look really ugly sometimes especially since my face got the pimple scars from my last breakout which i have recovered from yay. i can't smile properly yet too, which sucks, cause then i have terrible photos. So anyways, today was my first tightening, its quite sore, but it's okay. I changed colour from black and red to pink and yellow, cause i really didn;t know what colour to choose. I think i'm going to try some turqoise the next time around, and i really hope the dentist tightens the top part cause i want to see some results FAST.

school has been okay, i dont really like equities and attending the math lecture alone, but i need to start attending already (starting tomorrow), and try to use the holidays to catch up on maths and equities. I'm totally digging alternative investments, simply cause its to understand and reading about it is actually interesting. So yea. Comms class is really fun, i have a great angmoh teacher and the people i sit with are VERY nice and funny, so despite having no good friends in class i actually look forward to comms class every week. yeah.

tuition has been okay, just that faiiqah is really hard to teach. haiiii. oh, and i joined the muslim society family day carnival committee hahaha i am looking forward to working with the people more malay friends in uni. okay my boyfriend is irritated at me now must go appease bye.

have fun,

liyanah

hi all. today's training was like shit. couldn't catch the freaking ball. damnnn pissed off. anyways, now all the sisters know the blog maybe i need to change my blog or have an extra blog. so i don't need to be really careful with I say.

There's laundry to do but i'm too freaking lazy to do them i guess i'm forced to do them tomorrow when i get back. friendly. i'm so freaking sian of everything. a bit cannot wait to start school so my mind will be occupied with better things like knowlege acquisition. plus the song sign thing a bit sian already don feel like doing i just wanna talk to kids and scold them using sign language.

life sucks i have so many things to say but i guess i really can't say much okaylah bye,

have fun people!

love,

me

Hihihihihi, was watching private practice i loveeeee kate walsh she's so hot lah, so anyways, when kevin didn't call her the whole day she was like i havent heard from you the whole day, please call me back, without being like you know angry or anything, and so i was like yeah, she's cool about it, why shouldn't i rightttttt?

once again i havent stepped out of this place in ages, although i have no reason to be here, but i think i will do something useful like wetwipe the room, and clear the worksheets. maybe time my timetable and stuff like that. i just hope i don run out of shows to watch. hohoho. okay lah bye.

love,

me

it's been one week since hadi has gone, and the feeling still hasn't sunk it yet. it's a weird feeling when you realise that someone of your age, whom you thought would be there until we all have kids or something, is no longer around. I'm still pretty sad whenever I think about it, but with exams around, friends and the cats, you don't really think about it all day long. Whenever i think of his half covered face, with his thick eyelashes down onto his skin, lying there, the realisation sets it again and my heart literally drops. Its a weird feeling.

Although we weren't as close as I wish our family would be, it was getting better when he worked for Father. He was like a friend rather than a cousin. We called him boy boy, which always made me laugh, cause we never thought he was like that. He called me Lyns and my sis Lish. We used to have so much fun playing at our grandma's place whenever we stayed over. He used to sing to Go Harvey Go Harvey Go Harvey Norman Go! and replaced it with his name, Which was funny.

I'm just regretting that as cousins we all drifted apart. Just when things were getting better, like to eat supper with him one day, to introduce kngg, to at least go out with him...I'm just sad. For his mother and father. And probably all the plans that he had. Its just a bit hard to imagine having like a family gathering with one person missing, forever.

I just hope it wasn't painful for him. Till then, like what Father said, I guess we all have to remember how he lived and not how he went away.

Don't worry friends, I am very okay. Just a lil sad and cannot help but think about it.

Good luck for your papers people!

Love,

me

hi. i think i'm lacking happy posts around here. let me start happy then. today we had project meeting with my investments group mates and i really like them. working with them is more fun than working with *ahem*. it's a bummer i couldn't work with them more but oh well. here is a photo we took.

Sometimes, shit happens. and it sucks not being able to help your friends and family when they're in need.

this is what makes the world so interesting. people are different. their approaches to life differ in so so many ways. some are happy go lucky, so are constanly questioning the what-ifs, some do it with moderation. some are angry, some are sad, some are nonchalant. some pretend, some don't. some are practical, some emotional, some superficial. a lil mix of everything makes the world an interesting place to live in. but these every same differences are the cause of so many conflicts, so much misery, happiness, anger and you realise that it's just one big big circle. the circle of life.

i'm sorry i'm so useless and i can't offer the best advice. i will never understand why things are turning out this way. VERY honestly, i would scold you and tell you that the tears are not worth it. but the thing is you already know. but you can't help it, so i cant force you to. so all i can do is look at you, smile and hope deeply inside that you will get over this very soon and smile again. i'm capable of handling very different emotions at the same time, because i have this ability to forget when i'm immersed in something else, but retrieve it back again. that's how i handled growing up in a storm of a disintegrating family without letting it affect me so much. so what i'm saying is that you can come to me and tell me or cry to me. i have two ears to listen to you, huge eyes to look at you, one (BIG) mouth to talk to you, sing, make stupid comments and a whole flabby peary body to give you a mighty mighty hug. sometimes i may be caught up in my lil activities, kngg, project and/or sleeping too much, but it only shows i have too much time for other thigns. i'm sorry cause i don't show my concern as much as how friends should. but you know i care. so yeah. please please please take care of yourself. or let us take care of you.

okay.

love,

me

Dear God/Dear Diary,

I hope i will not be a needy girl cause i'm showing signs of it. I need to wake up. be independent. be okay with not talking for a few weeks/days/hours like the good ole times (except when i was disappeared on for like one week?) but anyways this is what happens when you enjoy too much of something it becomes a drug and you demand more of it. attention is a drug. okay. I NEED TO WAKE UP. I'm such a doodlehead whatever that means okay BUY!

love,

me

ugh. boys suck.