it's been one week since hadi has gone, and the feeling still hasn't sunk it yet. it's a weird feeling when you realise that someone of your age, whom you thought would be there until we all have kids or something, is no longer around. I'm still pretty sad whenever I think about it, but with exams around, friends and the cats, you don't really think about it all day long. Whenever i think of his half covered face, with his thick eyelashes down onto his skin, lying there, the realisation sets it again and my heart literally drops. Its a weird feeling.

Although we weren't as close as I wish our family would be, it was getting better when he worked for Father. He was like a friend rather than a cousin. We called him boy boy, which always made me laugh, cause we never thought he was like that. He called me Lyns and my sis Lish. We used to have so much fun playing at our grandma's place whenever we stayed over. He used to sing to Go Harvey Go Harvey Go Harvey Norman Go! and replaced it with his name, Which was funny.

I'm just regretting that as cousins we all drifted apart. Just when things were getting better, like to eat supper with him one day, to introduce kngg, to at least go out with him...I'm just sad. For his mother and father. And probably all the plans that he had. Its just a bit hard to imagine having like a family gathering with one person missing, forever.

I just hope it wasn't painful for him. Till then, like what Father said, I guess we all have to remember how he lived and not how he went away.

Don't worry friends, I am very okay. Just a lil sad and cannot help but think about it.

Good luck for your papers people!

Love,

me